‘Gonna have me some dragon tonight’—earthy words one would certainly be shocked to hear when setting out for the night on the pull. Except in romantic fiction. That wonderfully strange and much misunderstood place where, if done right (with brilliant characterization and layer upon layer of emotional challenge) even shagging a tree can seem not just normal, but positively envied.
A T-Rex with wings and demonized in the West, a serpent and revered in the East, scaly and fire-breathing, red, black, blue, green or white, dragons don’t exactly have the best rep in the visually attractive stakes, but there is no denying that when it comes to the sexy rankings, they are right up there with the best of the phallic gods—thanks to, yes, romantic fiction.
My guest today, Jane Hunt, creator of the Dragon Legacy Series, has certainly hoisted dragons up the sex league and I’m relieved that she’s agree to share with us her sage advice on:
5 Things Never To Do With A Dragon
1. Never travel on a bus with a dragon - You wouldn't make that mistake I hear you comment, but what if the dragon was disguised by his human form? The Dragon Legacy's heroine Fleur shuddered when asked about this, saying "They take up too much room. I ended up in a dragon's lap through no fault of my own, and that's not all, they have a tendency to set alight everyone they come in contact with. My first meeting with a dragon on bus left me with scorch marks."
2. Never play murder mystery with a dragon - they upstage the humans and turn the game into an apocalyptic reality show where the players are dragons and demons and the murders are real.
3. Never share a kiss with a dragon - No danger of that is there, after all, they are not the most attractive of creatures with their reptilian looks. What if your dragon has hypnotic golden eyes and blue-black hair and a hard body honed by centuries of demon slaying? Now you see my problem, but be warned. Though the dragon may be hidden, the fire burns brightly, and kiss the dragon and the flames will lick their way to your heart.
4. Never go flying with a dragon - Now you might be forgiven for thinking that flying with a dragon would be one of the safer things you could undertake, but what if your dragon exists as a human and that's the one who wants to fly you into oblivion? Makes you think doesn't it? Even if you trust them enough to leave the safety of the ground the flight itself has many inherent dangers, especially if the dragon is hot and I don't mean fire-breathing!
5. Never share your thoughts with a dragon - If you don't believe dragons exist outside of fairytales, I caution you against sharing this belief. Dragons are proud creatures and have many ways of making you believe in them. If you deny their existence they will steal into your mind until you accept the truth.
Right, thanks for that Jane. I've taken note--no buses (moi? as if), no scoffing unless you have a desire to be toast...smeared with honey, lightly golden, yup, I think I could go with that...
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